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Listening and Understanding with Empathy
What is it? – Paraphrasing, attending, seeking other’s feelings
Sounds like – “So you’re suggesting….” “Your idea is…..” “You’re upset because…..” You’re excited about…….”
Looks like – Facing one another. Eye contact. Nodding.
Feels like – This person cares enough to really listen to me. Comforting, Trusting, Vulnerable
We want students to learn to devote their mental energies to another person and to invest themselves in their partner’s ideas. We want students to learn to hold in abeyance their own values, judgments, opinions, and prejudices so they can listen to and entertain another person’s thoughts. This is a complex skill requiring the ability to monitor one’s own thoughts while at the same time attending to a partner’s words. Listening in this way does not mean we can’t disagree with someone. Good listeners try to understand what other people are saying. In the end, they may disagree sharply, but because they have truly listened, they know exactly the nature of the disagreement.
“The simple act of paying attention can take you a long way”. Keanu Reeves
“If you want to be listened to, you should put in time listening.” Marge PiercyInformation on Habits of Mind are taken from the book Habits of Mind by Costa and Kallick.